The question I am sure has been asked by parents from every generation is, “What is wrong with the teens of today?” Have you ever heard the song from the group Xscape, Understand? The first few stanza’s go something like this: What I need from you is understanding, how can we communicate, if you don’t hear what I say.
The funny thing is that both the parents and the adolescent are SCREAMING, and the sounds are vibrating off all the walls, streets, in the care or wherever you are rather than getting to the heart of the people who feel they are not being heard.
Often teens and their parents or the person who is the authority figure are in small battles that become so entangled that everyone has lost sight of the goal in winning the war.
We all have an inner child that is screaming out for attention, love and most of all the need to be heard. However, as adults… most of us have learned to tame our emotions and through experience learned to respond in more healthy manners.
Adolescents are on the rollercoaster of their lives. In this developmental stage which begins at about 11 and ends at 19 to 21 years they are dealing with physical, cognitive and social emotional development.
The goal to successfully graduate from this stage is to develop a mature sense of self and purpose. They learn how to establish and maintain healthy relationships, share intimacy comfortably and to understand abstract ideas and develop their own view points.
This all sounds great but if it were only a nice” Easy Like Sunday Morning” melody we would not be here today!
Well, have no fear! Take a deep breath and then exhale. I am here to work with you adolescent to get to a place of understanding and wholeness.
If you are unsure if your teen needs help, consider the following warning signs:
- Sadness, hopelessness- Have you noticed your teen breaking out into tears at seemingly insignificant matters or telling you he/she doesn’t understand why they’re so unhappy?
- Irritability, anger, or hostility: Are these feelings starting to become more frequent, intense or are unusual for your teen, it may be growing from something more than just routine
- Withdrawal from friends or family: Does your teen spend more and more time in their room? Avoiding social situations?
- Loss of interest in activities: Is your teen suddenly disinterested in playing in the band or signing up for soccer? Does he/she not want to do much of anything anymore?
- Poor school performance: Falling grades and difficultly concentrating can be a big sign that something is just not right. Often it is difficult to focus in school if something is not right
- Changes in eating or sleeping habits: Is your teen suddenly not interested in eating or is he/she going on food binges? Have you noticed your teen asleep at odd hours or up all night?