When the 1 in 4 Speaks, Will we listen or Will we walk away?
One in four women will experience sexual assault in her lifetime.
That statistic includes teenagers. It includes young women. It includes professionals. It includes mothers. It includes women in church spaces, schools, workplaces, and relationships.
And yet, when someone speaks up, too often they are met with silence, confusion, or dismissal.
I recently watched Reality Check: Inside America’s Next Top Model, and one moment stood out deeply. A young woman expressed discomfort about the way a male model was touching her during a scene. She was visibly distressed. Instead of advocacy, she was told she could simply tell him to stop.
She spoke up.
And still stood alone.
As a trauma and intimacy therapist, I see this pattern often. The harm is painful. But the silence afterward can be even more damaging.
Why Do People Minimize Sexual Assault?
Many people unconsciously experience cognitive dissonance when faced with sexual harm. Cognitive dissonance happens when new information challenges our sense of safety or identity.
If someone believes:
“This is a safe environment.”
“That person would never do that.”
“I would have handled it differently.”
Then witnessing assault creates psychological discomfort. To reduce that discomfort, some people minimize, rationalize, or look away.
Not because they are evil. But because acknowledging harm requires action.
Unfortunately, that minimization increases isolation for the one who spoke.
Common Questions Teen Girls and Women Ask After Sexual Assault
These are real questions women type into Google every day:
Was it sexual assault if I didn’t say no?
Why didn’t I fight back?
Why do I feel guilty after being assaulted?
Why does my body freeze during sexual situations?
Is it normal to feel confused about what happened?
Can you have trauma even if it wasn’t violent?
Why do I feel uncomfortable around men now?
Why didn’t anyone protect me?
Why does it still bother me years later?
If you’ve asked these questions, you are not alone.
What Happens in the Body After Sexual Trauma?
When someone feels unsafe, the nervous system responds automatically. That response may look like:
Freezing
Fawning (people-pleasing for safety)
Dissociation
Compliance to avoid escalation
Emotional shutdown
These are survival responses.
Compliance is not consent. Freezing is not agreement. Silence is not permission.
Years later, these survival patterns may show up as:
Anxiety in relationships
Difficulty with sexual intimacy
Avoidance of touch
Feeling numb during sex
Hypervigilance
Shame or self-blame
These responses are not weakness. They are trauma adaptations.
For Bystanders: How to Support Someone Impacted by Sexual Harm
If someone shares their story with you:
Believe first. Investigate later.
Avoid minimizing language like “it wasn’t that bad.”
Ask, “How can I support you right now?”
Validation reduces shame. Silence increases it.
For Teen Girls and Women Impacted by Sexual Assault
If you are carrying this:
Continue naming your experience. What happened to you matters.
Seek trauma-informed support. Healing is not something you have to do alone.
Remember: what happened to you does not define your worth or your future.
Your body responded to protect you. Your nervous system adapted. You are not broken.
How Therapy Can Help After Sexual Assault
At Journey to New Beginnings Counseling Services, we provide trauma-informed therapy for teen girls and women in Alabama and virtually.
Our approaches include:
EMDR therapy for trauma processing
Somatic therapy to regulate the nervous system
DBT skills for emotional stabilization
Attachment-focused therapy for relationship healing
Faith-sensitive support when desired
If you are searching:
Therapy for sexual assault near me
Trauma therapy for teens
Why am I triggered by touch?
Help after sexual trauma in Alabama
Sexual intimacy problems after trauma
You deserve support that understands both trauma and intimacy healing.
One in Four Is Not Just a Statistic
It is someone sitting beside you in class. It is someone in your workplace. It is someone in your family. It may be you.
When someone speaks, our response matters.
Healing is individual work. Safety is collective work.
When the one in four speaks — may we choose to listen.
If you or your teen daughter are seeking trauma-informed therapy in Alabama or virtual therapy for sexual assault recovery, contact Journey to New Beginnings Counseling Services to schedule a confidential consultation.
You do not have to navigate this alone.